(no subject)

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Date: January 4, 2001
Status: Private - Adam, Pepper
Setting: Pepper's Room
Summary: Adam wants to check up on his friend.


It had been three days since their New Year's kiss and Adam hadn't seen Pepper anywhere. He was starting to get a little worried. It could have gone better, sure, but she wouldn't just avoid him afterward, would she? He didn't want that to happen again.

Just in case, Adam went to the kitchen and armed himself with Wensleydale's best hot cocoa. When Wens had learned it was for Pepper, he added extra whipped cream and a mint leaf. Smiling faintly, Adam carried it carefully up the stairs and knocked on her door.

"Pep? You in there? I got somethin' for ya."

Comments

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Pepper had been coating her hands in some generic brand of Neosporin-like ointment in hopes of mending her poor fingers and forearms. She'd gotten a little overzealous in the greenhouse, and the plants had not appreciated it. She thought she might send Crowley a note and ask if he would give them another lecture. She just wasn't frightening enough. These past few days it was no wonder, really.

When the knock came Pepper was fully prepared to tell whoever it was to come right in, but she paused at the call. She could keep silent, pretend she wasn't there. He'd know of course, but at least she wouldn't have to do this. It was also childish, though, and in the end it was her pride that demanded she call back. She had to prove she wasn't broken, not for anything. Least of all for something as ridiculous as... well, not a broken heart. That sounded over-dramatic, and girly besides.

"Yeah, in 'ere." She pushed down the sleeves of her green cotton sweater to make her scrapes less evident, but she didn't face him. Not yet. Instead, she kept busy by oiling her sheers with a rag at her desk. Probably not the nicest thing to do around the furniture, but she didn't really care.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

A few seconds after pushing the door open, Adam's head slowly appeared around it, though he didn't step in right away in case anything was hurled in his general direction. It would be nicer if the door caught whatever it was instead of his stomach. But when there was no hint of early projectiles, he walked in. Catching sight of Pepper sitting quietly, he bit his lip worriedly.

"Um, Pepper? 's a bit cold today, so I brought you some hot choc'late..."

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

She smelled Wensley's cocoa before he had said a word, just as easily as she could read his expression by tone of voice alone. It would be simple to just turn around with a smile and grab her cup like nothing was wrong, but not after that note in his voice. Maybe she should have thrown something. At least he would have known how to react to that.

"Stop lookin' at me like that," she demanded, without turning around. "'S cold every day. 'S winter. So what're you doin' up 'ere?" Nevermind what the cocoa was supposed to symbolize, she wanted him to stop being a boy and come out and say it. Surely after the events of a few days ago, they were big enough for that now.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

If she wanted him to just say it, he would. Adam set the mug on the corner of her desk and glanced at the side of her head.

"Hadn't seen you in a coupla days an' I was gettin' worried," he admitted. "So I wanted to check-in and see how you were doin'. But if you want me to go, I will."

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

"Didn't say I wanted you t'go," she said flippantly, though she meant it. She glanced over at the hot chocolate on the desk longingly.

"What you been doin', then?" She wasn't quite sure how else to start the conversation, but Pepper figured that plunging on ahead with a simple question was the best she could manage at the moment.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Grateful to be allowed to stay, Adam sat on the edge of her bed. "Go on, drink it 'fore it gets cold."

He scratched the side of his head, thinking. "Well, I been keepin' an eye on people, mostly. Wens an' Brian been a bit weird after everythin' and Remus an' Sirius, too. Aziraphale's off in London by himself an' all lonely. Everyone else seems okay for the minute. Oh, I took care of the monthly food supplies, too, an' did December's books. Manor made 'bout nine pounds last month," he laughed lightly. "Better'n losin' money, I guess. How 'bout you?"

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Once the cocoa had been mentioned she couldn't help but pick up the cup and take a long sip. Wensley was always good at making sure it wasn't too hot. She managed to get whipped cream on her nose without noticing though, which probably made her face an amusing picture.

"You really are lucky that you can just make things work around 'ere," she said thoughtfully. "Dun't even want to think about what the bills for this place would be if you actually had to pay them." She was surprised to hear that Crowley's angel was off in London. She hadn't realized the fallout was that bad. No wonder he'd been so depressed. She remembered Sirius, but she had no idea who Remus was, but hearing it connected with... "Well, my first question was gonna be to ask if Sirius was bent too, because that'd be funny, but now you've got me all worried - what do y'mean, Brian and Wensley are bein' weird?"

She flexed the fingers of her free hand at his question. "Er... well, I tried to clean up in the greenhouse, sort of rearrange things, so it'd be easier to move around an' all. The plants didn't really like it." She held up the battered hand to make the point.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Squelching the impulse to wipe Pepper's nose with his thumb, Adam handed her a napkin, pointing to his own nose and smiling faintly.

"Yeah," he agreed, "it's prob'ly best that I'm not really an innkeeper. 'Course it'd help if anyone act'lly paid for their rooms..."

Nodding, he went on. "Sirius is gay. He's living with a bloke name of Remus who works reception. I guess they knew each other in school an' been best friends for a long time, like Bri and Wens. An' I mean weird weird. Like they got all scared and confused after and now aren't talkin' to each other. It's always somethin', isn't it?"

Adam sighed and looked at Pepper's arm. "Maybe I should ask Crowley to make 'em behave better for you. But you c'n get Gabriel to look at that if you want. I'm sure he'd be glad for somethin' simple to do." There was a slight pause and he looked at her sideways. "You usu'lly start cleanin' things when you've got somethin' on your mind..."

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Pepper looked at the napkin quizzically for a moment before the recognition dawned on her face, which came in two parts; first wide-eyed embarrassment, then a sarcastic snort as she snatched the napkin from him and wiped her nose off. Nope, nothing ladylike here, that was for sure.

"You'd think payin' for their room wouldn't be a problem for most of 'em," she said wonderingly. "I mean, most of them c'n just make whatever they want, right? Then again, so c'n you, so I guess it doesn't really matter." She knew there was an economy lesson in there somewhere, but she really wasn't interested.

She chuckled after a moment, remembering how uncomfortable John had been and oh-so-amused to know that he had been nervous about the wrong person under the mistletoe. "Well, that explains a few things for sure," she decided before sighing heavily. "They're not talkin'? I'll beat them both. Bloody stupid the two of them, you can't fix anythin' without-" But she cut herself off as some private voice in her ear shouted the word hypocrite. As if she were any damn better. No, in the end it was Adam, Adam as always. He was the one who knew what needed to be done.

So the least she could do was meet him halfway. "I c'n ask Crowley. He did it b'fore, I think they just got lax with 'im away. And I dun't need Gabriel for it; it's nothin' I haven't dealt with on the playground when we were tiny." She felt his gaze, always keener than she felt anyone's, so she looked up and met it. "I just... wasn't sure. About how badly I'd screwed up. With you." She had luckily managed to stop herself before she said us; there wasn't an us, there was him.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

"Bloody hell!" she shrieked, grabbing Sharky from where he'd fallen by the wayside, and beating Adam over the head with him. "Not fair! I can't-" gasp for air "-turn your hair into gold 'f I can't- ah!"

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

"'at's the point," he wheezed. "Like my hair..." Adam threw his hands up to protect his short curls from Sharky, releasing Pepper from her torture and trying to take a breath, which wasn't easy with her lying on his chest.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

She noticed the wheezing and laughed. "Oh, 'm sorry. Are you havin' trouble? Is there something you need help with." She turned Sharky to look at her and gave him a very serious look. "I think he's havin' problems with his airway. We might win the battle yet...."

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Another boy with another girl lying on him might have suggested that she help him clear it. But Adam wasn't another boy and he thought Pepper would probably hit him if he tried. Besides, this was supposed to lessen the awkwardness, not increase it, so he grabbed her shoulders and rolled them over so he was on top. This allowed him enough air to proclaim victory. "A-ha! I've foiled you an' your fiendish henchshark."

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Some people would have said that rolling that boy over so he was on top would in no way dispense with awkwardness. However, this was a familiar enough scene to Pepper that she actually didn't think much of it. Besides, the word 'henchshark' was currently seizing up her brain and making it very difficult for her to think at all.

"It doesn't matter what you do!" she declared triumphantly, tugging on one of the curls of (gold) hair above her. "If you beat us now I will return with an army of henchsharks, an' you will have to choice but to surrender!"

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Well, the not asking Pepper if she'd help clear his airway with her tongue probably did help dispense with that awkwardness. Them being physical, though, seemed perfectly normal.

"But I'll train while you're off recruitin' your army of henchsharks, Fraulein, so that when you return, I'll be ready for you. Me an' my army of good bears. You'll never defeat us. Your plans for takin' over the world end now!"

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Bears, eh? She could see them now, an army of brown, frayed things all missing their left eye. "You're bringin' poor Fuzz into this? He was never much of a fighter, y'know." Honestly, where had they come up with those names as kids? Then again, it was probably just as well that they had. If they had named them any later, they'd be having discussions about a shark named Marco Pollo and a bear named Magellan.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Hey, Adam had a tendency to name things what they were. It was probably genetic or something. Fuzz had been a gift from Pepper on his 5th birthday, and she'd stated that if he called it anything but Fuzz, he was a stupidhead. He'd returned the favor with Sharky a few months later.

"I'll have you know, Fuzz is an experienced campaigner," he teased, having finally regained his breath. "He could be general by now if he hadn't lost that eye in the Boer War." Now that had been a fun afternoon. They'd all four come home more filthy than usual. Even Wensley.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Pepper made a face. "Er, think I'll pass on that one, thank you. That would be jus' about as weird as you 'n women's underclothes." Though the rugby part would probably be fun. "Unless you've been hankerin' to try on a bra?" she teased. She moved her fingers to her back as though she were considering removing the thing and handing it over to him.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

He looked thoughtful a moment. "Well, I never have before. Might be interestin'..."

Then Adam caught sight of Pepper's face and burst out laughing. "Kiddin', I'm kiddin'. There's some that like that sorta thing, but I don't think I'm one of 'em. So, I dun't think bein' the boy gets you any special privileges. Sorry."

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

"Never know 'f you like it 'til you try it," she shot back, grinning. Adam probably wouldn't, though. Brian might; she had managed to get him into women's stockings when they were twelve and he'd said that they kept his legs nice and warm.

She mock pouted. "Well, I feel gypped, then. Why does that Freud chap keep sayin' all us girls envy you lot 'f there's really nothin' to envy?"

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

"Dunno," he grinned. "I think you c'n have a pretty good idea in advance. But you barely stand 'em. Why would I?"

Adam chuckled. "Guess there was more to envy when he was writin' that stuff. Since girls mostly didn't have jobs and weren't allowed to do much of anythin'. Now there doesn't seem to be anythin' dif'rent, 'part from the physical..."

He sort of wanted to ask Pepper if she ever thought she'd like to have a baby someday, but with the revelation from October when Roger showed up and the relationship he'd denied her, it seemed too cruel to ask.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

"Because your the girl," She said, rolling her eyes because honestly, he should have seen that roundabout coming a mile off.

"Well, that's not true everywhere in the world," she said, a little melancholy. It seemed a silly thing to get upset about with the end of the world dangling on the horizon, but she still felt awkward to know that she could have been born a few hundred miles away and not been able to wear trousers, or play with boys, or go to school. It had been something her mother had been very avid in pointing out through her childhood. Count your blessings, love...

Funny enough, Pepper had no idea how she felt about the idea of having children. She would have probably been damned surprised to hear Adam ask about it, though. She had just always figured that she would know when the time came, if it ever did. Details and planning had never worked out so well for her; she would just know it was right when it was.

She was more like her mother than she knew.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

"Even if I'm the girl," Adam argued, "I'm not built like one. And I don't hafta wear a bra, jus' like you won't wear the cup." He got a far-away look in his eyes. "I wonder what we'd look like if I really was a girl an' you a boy, though. Wensley would have a heart attack," he laughed.

"No," he agreed. "But things have gotten better in some places, haven't they? Doesn't that mean that with time they will everyplace else? A hundred an' fifty years ago, women couldn't vote anywhere in the world an' there was still slavery. A lot has changed in not very much time. Ask any of the immortals an' they'll tell you how fast it's been. So when other people see how well it's workin', they'll wanna try it, too. Who knows what things'll be like in another hundred an' fifty years. All we c'n do is try to make it better now and let other people do the rest later."

That's what he expected really. Adam hoped she'd have the chance to make that decision someday but feared she wouldn't.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Pepper laughed at the thought of Wensley's face if she one day turned up as a boy. "Well, I'd 'ave shorter hair, for sure," she decided. "You'd prob'ly be all sorts of pretty an' people'd still be payin' to touch your gymshorts, only not the same ones." That was pretty damn funny the more she thought about it. "Other than that... who knows? Maybe I'd'ave been stockier, like my grandad."

She really wasn't sure how she thought the world was capable of changing. Seemed liked some things were just never okay with people no matter what. But it was hard to think that way with Adam around. "Yeah, that sounds about right." Her family was an example of that more than anything.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam blushed, thinking of the kind of shorts he'd wear if he were a girl. Of course, he doubted they could be more uncomfortable than those tiny rugby shorts he'd had to wear on his birthday. Willing the thought away, he said, "You could be a boy for Halloween, if you want. Then you could dress as a pirate or a lion tamer or anythin' an' no one'd know it was you." Well, until she started yelling at them anyway...

"'s why I let it keep goin'," he explained. "We're gettin' so close, it seemed a shame to end it all 'fore we could find out what happens. People of all dif'rent races an' religions gettin' married... Soon enough, we'll all be light brown." He held up his golden arm dusted with fine blond hairs and laughed. "An' you won't sunburn so easy then."