(no subject)

[archangel-mike.livejournal.com]

Date: December 29, 1999 (right after Michael's conversation with Raphael)
Setting: Mostly Uriel's room
Status: Private -- Michael and Uriel (Complete)
Summary: Michael needs to talk.


Michael's mind was a mess as he walked down the corridor. A part of him -- well, actually most of him -- was still stunned. He had actually kissed Raphael. Twice. On Raphael's insistence.

It was rather unbelievable, really. The fact that he had finally been told to leave, and that Raphael would probably just deny it all come morning, did nothing to make him less delighted. The end of the world could have come right then and there, and he would still have been perfectly happy. Well... maybe not. But close enough.

Slowly, however, his mind came back to other, more disturbing matters. Now that he was mostly out of his stunned state, the feeling of uneasiness that had been nagging at him for a while now had come back. Throughout his conversation with Raphael he had been getting this same feeling, telling him that something was definitely not right. And, like he had already told the healer, he sincerely feared for Raphael, for he was rather certain that the thing that was wrong was Raphael's thoughts and attitude. Recently, Raphael had... changed.

Oh, he still loved Raphael, of course -- which was exactly why he was so concerned. Perhaps he was just overreacting. He'd been thinking about nothing but Raphael lately; it was only natural that his mind linked everything else with the redhead. Most probably his feeling of uneasiness was the result of something entirely else -- or it was just his own imagination. Yes, that must be it.

So why couldn't he make himself believe it?

He simply had to talk with somebody about it, but didn't know who. It had to be another angel, that was for sure. He wouldn't talk about such a matter with anybody else. However, there weren't many angels nearby, and somehow he didn't think he should go to Aziraphale and Gabriel. Uriel seemed like the best option, but... it would probably be nothing short of extremely awkward to discuss such a thing with him.

However much he thought about it, Michael kept coming back to the conclusion that he had to talk with somebody to put his worries at rest or at least clear his head. By the time he had reached Uriel's door, he had come to a decision.

He stopped, turned towards the door, and knocked.

Comments

[bipolar-uriel.livejournal.com]

Uriel didn't start to disagree with Michael. Although it wasn't exactly how he felt himself, Michael's words had mostly just surprised him; he dind't get the same uneasy feeling from them as he had from his conversation with Raphael. There was no need to start arguing just for the sake of it.

He blinked in surprise as Michael suddenly started tearing his hair. Finally he just stared at the other archangel. Michael's hair was now shorter than his own. The warrior looked quite different without the usual long curtain of wavy blond hair surrounding his face.

"Such a drastic change," he said once he had recovered from the initial surprise. "How do you think Raphael will react to that?"

[archangel-mike.livejournal.com]

"What does it matter?" asked Michael quietly. "It's not like I have any chance with him anyway."

Again, Michael raised a hand to silence Uriel before the other could say anything. "After I talked with him, well... He asked me to -- to kiss him. Of course I did -- and I've never felt anything better, anything that could even compare to it." Even now, the memory of it filled him with such delight that he simply didn't find words for it. It also filled him with something else, something that was rather awkward in Uriel's company.

"But he pulled away, and -- he was afraid, Uriel. Afraid of me." Michael closed his eyes as a barrier against the pain that tried to reach him through the still very fresh memory. "I don't ever want to see that look on his face again, Uriel. Not even if avoiding seeing it means staying away from him for the rest of my existence." At the end of the sentence his voice was merely a broken whisper.

[bipolar-uriel.livejournal.com]

For a moment Uriel found himself in a situation very rare to him as he didn't know what to say. Finally, he managed to say, "I hardly think Raphael is truly afraid of you. Rather he is afraid of an unfamiliar situation he doesn't know how to handle. Perhaps it is also his own feelings -- at first he thinks that making an effort is the vilest of sins, and now he is asking you to kiss him? It would be a wonder if he weren't scared at all. Surely even Raphael, who admittedly can occasionally be rather oblivious, knows that you would never do anything to hurt him."

Then, he shrugged, feeling a bit awkward -- also not a familiar feeling to him. "I can't say for sure, though. It's not like I know what he is thinking, after all."

Wanting to keep himself occupied to distract himself from the most unusual confusion, he summoned the long fallen strands of Michael's hair into his hands. With a simple wave he tied them together from one end and started to weave a thick braid.

[archangel-mike.livejournal.com]

It felt rather strange to look at Uriel's hands and realize that the blond strands being currently braided had moments before been connected to his own head. Suddenly struck by odd curiousity Michael tiled his head to the side, marveling the feeling of not having hair brushing his neck as he did so.

To Uriel's words he could say nothing. Therefore they both just stood there for some time, waiting for the other to say something. Finally, Michael gave up. He really didn't know what to say, and the memory of kissing Raphael floating around his mind was making him rather... bothered.

"Thanks for your company, Uriel," he sighed. "I think I need some time alone right now. I'm too confused to even think straight."

He turned around to go to the door. Just then, however, his eyes met something, and he froze, staring in horror at the painting of a witch being burned alive... a witch who bore a significant resemblance to Raphael.

"...Uriel?" he asked, his voice very quiet. "Just what is that?"

[bipolar-uriel.livejournal.com]

Uriel looked at what Michael was staring at. Suddenly he felt rather uneasy for some reason. "That? Obviously, it is a painting," he said. As he then felt Michael turning to stare at him instead, an unspoken accusation clear in the other's eyes, he sighed. "I don't wish for Raphael's demise," he said quietly. "However, ever since I spoke with him all I've been able to create have been images of destruction. If he is involved in that destruction, it is purely subconscious, not intentional on my part."

He paused for a while, then finished quietly, "I least of all would ever want anybody to Fall. And definitely not Raphael."

[archangel-mike.livejournal.com]

Michael nodded slowly, his eyes again fixed at the painting, still feeling rather unsettled. Suddenly the only thing he wanted to do was to get as far from that painting, and Uriel's room, and Uriel himself as possible.

He bid hasty goodbyes and fled the room, not giving the other archangel any change to say anything. At the moment, he wished for nothing more than to be alone.

[bipolar-uriel.livejournal.com]

Uriel sighed as Michael left the room. The other seemed to be rather distressed over all this, and, in all honesty, Uriel felt the same himself. He understood Michael's wish to be away from him. Had he been in the other's place, he probably would have fled as well.

"May the Presence be strong in you, Michael," he whispered in his usual manner even though there was nobody around to hear it anymore. Then, his voice too quiet to ever reach mortal ears, he added, more a plea -- or prayer -- than a wish, "And in Raphael as well."