(no subject)

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

Date: February 11th, 2001
Setting: Hospital Wing
Status: Private - Aziraphale, Loki
Summary: Aziraphale tells Loki of Uriel's evident departure.




Dark and cold, the hospital wing welcomed a quiet soul with its sombre cleanliness and antiseptic smell. Down to the room where its sole patient of the day rested he walked, listening to the quiet tap-tap of his hard-soled shoes on the stone floors.

If the god had been well, he would've waited. If the god showed any signs of anything but getting sicker and sicker as time went on, he would've waited. In case he was the one announcing the news of a friend's departure, instead of timidly asking where she and her new son might be, as he wanted to.

Regardless of fights, regardless of the current love lost between he and Crowley, the angel did keep his past promises to the best of his ability, and his inexplicable inability to find the child he'd promised to help take care of irked him, ever so slightly.

Besides this, there was the deeply guilty feeling of a friend, or at least a neighbour, being so ill and so near him. Would it have pained him to come earlier, to say hello before he'd needed information?

"Hello," he was saying now, knocking on the door in the quiet of the wing. "Hello, good morning. It's Aziraphale. May I come in?"

Comments

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

"Not at all," the angel smiled, closing the door behind him as he entered and hovered uncertainly near a chair. "You look quite... rather, I mean, of course you wouldn't look... Ah. It's nice to see you, Loki. Is there anything I can get you? A glass of water perhaps? On another day I could lend you books from the Manor library, but..." today I come on another matter, his voice ached to finish. He cleared it roughly, mindful to pull out a handkerchief and press it to his mouth as he did so. Something about immune systems of invalids... even though it was just clearing his throat.

"Would this be a good time to talk?" he asked awkwardly, hands resting on the back of the chair. "Are you feeling well enough to, I mean? I'd hate to cause you any undue distress..."

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

"Oh sit down already," Loki said smiling at the not-god's antics. He wasn't used to people being very considerate around him. Well, people around here were surprisingly considerate compared to what he was used to, but Ezra's awkwardness was a new experience. "I lost all my hair again, yes. I'm aware of that. More books are always welcome, though. If you can find something I haven't read yet, that is."

He had no idea what Ezra might want to talk about, but any distraction was welcome.

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

"Er. Well. Yes, all right."

He sunk into a chair, looking decidedly uncomfortable. "I'm actually here because I'm wondering if - if perhaps you've seen, or heard from Uriel, really. I haven't seen her lately and I worried that - well, you know, I haven't been around all that much..." He gave up. "Have you seen her?"

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

Loki's mood darkened the moment the not-god mentioned Uriel.

"Not since the day after I came in here. She had her baby a little after that. Last I heard of her was when she left for a little trip with The Doctor. She wrote me a note promising to visit soon, but I guess Bran's been distracting her too much."

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

Oh dear.

There was really no way to do this but bluntly, was there. And to a sick ma- god, no less.

"I think, Loki," Aziraphale began, "that perhaps Uriel may have left. For good, as it were. With Bran," he added. "It's probably all for the best but I don't think that she told anyone before going, particularly seeing as she hadn't told you. I owe her a favour, you see, but I haven't been able to fulfill it. I'm sorry."

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

"She ... what?" No, no that couldn't possibly be. She'd promised to be here and her pantheon was strong on helping the sick and weak and ... "But surely she'd have told me," he added weakly.

She'd known how much he'd been looking forward to seeing Bran. She'd even let him pick his name.

At least Anathema had passed on the stuffed spider for him. According to her Bran had liked it, too. He wondered whether it was true or Anathema had just wanted to spare him the knowledge that Uriel had thrown his gift away. A lot of people didn't like spiders after all. Would she have stayed, if he'd sent Bran a traditional teddy bear instead?

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

"Honestly... I would have thought she'd have told me, too. She was quite decent like that." A pause. "I am sorry, you know."

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

Loki stared at the not-god almost pleadingly. It just couldn't be! If Uriel was no longer here, Odin had no reason to return either.

Maybe that was it. Maybe Odin had somehow contacted her and they'd met up somewhere. She'd make a good replacement for Loki with her ability to create money from nothing.

"Are you absolutely sure?" he asked again. "You ... you are of her pantheon. Can't you feel her presence?" Some godly abilities varied greatly between pantheons, but as far as he knew this one was rather common.

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

Regretfully, the angel shook his head. "She's gone, Loki."

He sat in silence for a while, musing over the child Bran and the angel Uriel. Probably kept on this 'little trip' with the Doctor... well.

"If it is any consolation whatsoever, you're welcome to call on me for help. My healing skills may not match those of Gabriel or Crowley, but I offer them, at least."

A consolation prize, Aziraphale thought, but the best he could feasibly do.

"Just let me know."

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

Gone, lost, alone. He'd lost all his family all over again and once again they hadn't even said good bye. He felt like crying, but Viking gods didn't cry. Especially no in front of poncy little not-gods no matter how nice and harmless they might be.

So Loki did the only other thing he could think of to deal with his grief. He got angry. Anger was safe. Viking gods were allowed to get angry, were expected to even.

"And how do you think that's going to help?" he yelled. "Gabriel has tried to cure this. Some actual, real healing gods have tried. And you think a pathetic little librarian not-god can do what they can't? There's nothing you can do for me, nothing at all!"

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

Ringing silence filled the small room.

"All right," the angel acquiesced, after a moment. It wasn't so much as an agreement as it was a cautionary comfort to grief that needed an outlet. "Would you like me to go, then?"

[leucemic-god.livejournal.com]

Loki's first impulse was to yell yes and he almost did, but then the not-god would go and he'd be alone with his boredom again. His boredom and his memories of his sister and the nephew he'd never met.

And there was nothing Loki could do. He was much too weak to go look for his sister. Perhaps he'd have had a chance to find Odin, if he'd gone looking right away. Back then he had still been able to travel a bit.

"Will you tell me, if you hear from her?" Ezra was of the same pantheon and faction. Surely he had ways to contact his fellows that Loki had not.