(no subject)

[deatheater-cook.livejournal.com]

Time: Late afternoon, 25 July 2000
Place: The Manor Grounds
Status: Public
Summary: The Barbecue

Severus had prepared for this extensively, had done research as soon as he was told that he needed to provide food for a ‘barbecue’. Well, that was American, wasn’t it? A newly-published book titled The Great American Barbecue and Grilling Manual was his starting point. (The words ‘great’ and ‘American’ did not belong in the same sentence, although perhaps he might be mistaken, never having been to America.) After learning that this was not merely an American cuisine but a regional (Southern) American cuisine, he began to specialise. Having found a butcher to bring a pig and something to cook it over (yes, the whole pig, you dolt) he learned that it could have been done with a goat as it had been in the Caribbean, and with less effort.

Having put forth effort already, he pushed ahead. The intensive labour required to prepare food by the slow ‘barbecue’ method had been provided by Remus Lupin, although he surely did not understand when he volunteered exactly what it was he’d be doing. The butcher himself was also interested and so Snape had ‘invited’ him to come and help. Work for the day, eat. Bring your family with you and they can help and eat also. Only if they help. Severus’ labour shortage crisis solved.

The whole concept of barbecue sauce was confusing, so he’d made three kinds. Two for public consumption—a South Carolina style with mustard, vinegar and black pepper that seemed reasonable enough. Kansas City style that was thick, red-brown, and gloppy, made with a tomato base and molasses. The third was for Crowley, a Texas-style sauce amusingly named ‘Devil’s Spit’ made from a tomato base with cumin and hot chiles. These American chiles being unavailable, he procured an Oriental variety that were infinitely hotter. Let him call that bland.

Chicken would go on, although not for as long as the blasted pig, and sausages for the unadventurous. The Brunswick Stew might end up in the restaurant under ‘American Cuisine’. It was simple enough, with a tomato base, lima beans (or any beans), corn, other vegetables, and meat. Traditionally rabbit or squirrel but he could use leftover pork, chicken, beef or even cut-up sausages. Basically, a fine way to rid himself of leftover almost anything and he revised his opinion of American ingenuity. The true test would be Crowley’s opinion. If he disapproved, it was definitely going on the menu.

Okra and sweet potatoes proved impossible to procure. Field greens—of the turnip variety—were simple enough to cook in some of the extra pig fat. Black-eyed peas, which looked an awful lot like beans, with bacon. He made carrots in sauce of butter and brown sugar that seemed terribly French, but he simply shrugged. There would be green peas—not mushy, unfortunately, which would have made Crowley complain and Snape smile, a dish of fried apples that was a side dish, apparently popular with pork, and potato salad. It was a source of annoyance that the recipe he found for this called for red potatoes that did not need to be peeled. How brilliant would it have been to set Lupin to peeling potatoes for his own requested potato salad?

Cornbread was simple enough to make, although all the different names and types confused him. The concept of beaten biscuits was repulsive so he settled on cheddar biscuits instead. American biscuits, he found, were a bread roll that seemed a bizarre combination of bap, scone, and crumpet. But they were a Southern staple and very simple to make. Devilled eggs—also simple, seemingly French—were another extra dish along with pickles of varied types. He refused to make grits—porridge was bad enough at breakfast and he would certainly not serve it in any other time.

Cold tea, sweet, with or without lemon was also a disgusting concept. Lemonade, if people wished to drink it. Lupin had to deal with squeezing the lemons, too. He had procured some Bourbon and Belial would, he imagined, not object if any leftover made its way to the bar. Mint juleps required it. Mint grew in the garden and sugar was a staple.

Having no sweet potatoes with which to make sweet potato pie, which seemed unpleasant anyway, he went with pecan pie. It was too sweet, but someone would eat it. Pound cake with whipped cream (another job for Lupin) and blackberry cobbler, which was enough like local fare for people to be willing to eat it. If he could have found watermelon, that would have been amusing. But messy, so just as well he hadn’t found it.

All in all, it was a great effort on his part, slave labour or no, and people had better appreciate it else he would be extremely put out.

"Let Wensleydale handle things in the kitchen, Lupin. The butcher will take care of serving the meat. You can clear plates and make sure the dishes are all filled." He had planned this. "The butcher's wife can help with drinks. The children have been disposed of."

Out of the way, nothing more sinister. Eating now, washing dishes later. Work for food, and a good trade on his part.

"Keep an eye on the biscuits, Wensleydale, and see that they don't burn. And make sure there is plenty of ice."

He turned.

"No, mint juleps are not sweets, get away from me, you silly child." Weren't they supposed to be on the far side of the lawn, eating their supper?

Attention Edit: As of this point the Devil's Spit sauce is no longer on the serving table but in Snape's hands, doled out by him. Please do not have your character get into it.

Comments

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

"No, you don't hafta leave. Maybe you should look into findin' a way to get out your extra energy, though. Combat classes for the residents? I don't think you're the only one who'd enjoy the exercise..."

Sometimes it was hard being the grown-up.

[swords-love-me.livejournal.com]

War bit her lip, visibly this time. "Thank you."

She grinned, though maybe with less energy than usual. "Maybe you're right. I'll think about it - let people know they can join me training, maybe, or something. Though from what I've seen, a lot of us seem to have at least the basics already," she finished, wryly, and rubbed the side of her neck, wincing slightly.

Turning round, she looked to see if she could see any friendly faces in the people milling around them.

[demon-mictain.livejournal.com]

This, Mictain decided, might be a good time to step forward. He probably also counted as a friendly face, but that wasn't what he was thinking about -- he was just trying to get War out of any further trouble.

"If you need somebody to train with, I'm available," he said. "I need something to do as well." Yes, it was nice to have his sword back, but it was also kind of frustrating when he couldn't use it.

He smirked then, cocking his head to one side. "At least with me, you wouldn't have to worry about the teaching part."

[swords-love-me.livejournal.com]

At last, War saw the body she knew had been attached to the voice she'd been conversing with during the f... during what had happened.

She smirked right back at him. If that was the game they were playing, she could play it just as well as him. "True, with a sword. But when was the last time you shot a recurved bow, hm?"

"But, as you say, seems we both need chance to work off excess energy - I'm quite happy for you to join me training, especially for fencing and sword-fighting. There's only so far you can get practising the swings and blocks without matching them to something."

[tardis-lord.livejournal.com]

The Doctor had heard the commotion, but, being rather deeply involved in a conversation with Mictain and then deeply involved in looking at the food, he hadn't paid it much attention.

It was only after most of it was over did he turn his head from his plate of chicken and peas (unfortunately, there were no jelly babies) and catch sight of Pepper, lying on the ground, a new blond man he recognized as Adam from Uriel's picture, and War turning away.

And then he felt something surprising. Sympathy. Sympathy for her, the fierce red-head, as she scanned the crowd. Sympathy for her as she tried to look as tough and warrior-like as ever. Sympathy as he saw vulnerability in her.

He struggled with himself for a moment, then decided what the heck; he'd just become official allies with a demon. He might as well go whole-hog by attempting to befriend the woman who had shot at him only yesterday.

He walked over to her, hands in his pockets. "Sword-fighting?" he asked. He smiled a little. "Mind if I join? I could use some practice."

[swords-love-me.livejournal.com]

"Duckie?" War said, with a note of surprise in her voice. "I didn't think you liked fighting?"

"But," she continued, in a considered tone, "As far as I'm concerned, you're welcome to join me if you want to learn and practice. That is" - she paused, and glanced over to the blond demon standing next to her - "as long as Mictain doesn't mind?"

[tardis-lord.livejournal.com]

The Doctor shrugged. "Oh, I don't like it, but sometimes screwdrivers just aren't enough. And I think I did fairly well with the sword last time... Managed to save the human race (again), so obviously I didn't do too badly."

He flashed her a grin. "Wait for Christmas 2005 to find out exactly what I mean."*

He smiled brightly at the demon. "Oh, Mickey won't mind, will you?" He put an arm around the demon's shoulders, which was actually harder than he'd anticipated. Mictain was tall.


____
* The Christmas Invasion.

[demon-mictain.livejournal.com]

"I definitely wouldn't mind," Mictain replied, looking down at the human (for he indeed was tall). "The more people I can fight with legitimately, the better." Then, he smirked. "I have to warn you, though. I've been training for over six millennia, and Ruby here is probably even better. So if you truly want to join us for practice, prepare to train hard, E.T."

[swords-love-me.livejournal.com]

"Mickey?" War raised an eyebrow elegantly, then spoilt it by wrinkling her nose at Mictain. "Well, seems you two are getting along fairly well, anyway."

In answer to Mictain's earlier question, she said, "It's been a few days since I shot a recurved. But I was using my longbows" - she gestured at them leaning against the Manor wall - "just beforeI came over here."

Stooping to pick up her daggers, she continued, "And pot-kettle, Mictain. As you said - it'll do us both good to have a training - or sparring partner."

Remembering the Doctor, she said, "He's right, you know. He and I are the best, as far as I can tell." She smirked. "You'll get an excellent education at our hands, but it'll hurt. Actually, if it doesn't, you're not trying hard enough. I'm guessing you don't have any weapons of your own - you can borrow some of mine."

An interesting thought popped into her mind. "Have we ever played best-swordsperson, Mictain?" she asked. She wasn't going to start off catching up with the demon by saying thank you for the compliment.

[tardis-lord.livejournal.com]

"It's nice to be the best, isn't it?" the Doctor said, his tone suggesting they could join the club if they wanted to.

He shook his head. "I have some weapons," he said, "but not much in the way of swords and longbows. Actually, wait a moment, I think I've still got Robin's in there somewhere..." He paused and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I should probably give that back to him."

He watched the sky for a bit, then shrugged and returned to the present day. He smiled at War and Mictain. "Most of my weapons don't harm, and they don't take much skill to use. And the screwdriver, just to be clear," he pulled it out of his pocket, "is not a weapon."

It whirred blue for a bit, before he returned it to his pocket in case Loki saw and went crazy again.

[demon-mictain.livejournal.com]

Mictain smirked. "Well enough not to want to kill each other," he said. "Which, from me, is quite an achievement.

He wasn't sure how to feel as he saw War picking up her knives. Her hair reminded him of Raphael, while her choice of weapons at the moment was a reminder of Uriel. He was pretty sure he knew how he felt about those two beings, but he didn't want any of those feelings mixed with War.

"Can't say I have," he said in response to War's question. "I've never had to. Nobody has ever questioned my position as the best -- well, nobody after Lucifer, at least. Why so? Would you care to give it a try?”

[swords-love-me.livejournal.com]

"Well," War said, "You can always learn how to use weapons that do require skill. You can also use potentially harmful weapons just to scare people. Think about when you met me - you knew it was a real weapon that could do harm, but did I use it to hurt you, or anyone? I'll admit that I was probably over zealous, but there are situations where just having a weapon and showing you have the skill to use it - and are prepared to - can make a lot of difference."

She had noticed, out of the corner of her eye, the look Mictain gave her as she picked up the knives, and suddenly realised. Who else do I know in the Manor who carries knives... I ought to mention it to him, maybe. But I'll keep that conversation just between the two of us.

She smirked at him instead. "No one may have questioned it, but you just said "Ruby here is probably even better." I think it might set both our minds at rest to find out - after all, we'd only spend time wondering about who'd come out top, otherwise!"

She grinned, then said soberly, "Probably best to use practice swords though. And get a referee in, if we're doing it properly?"

[demon-mictain.livejournal.com]

"Oh, you know me," Mictain replied, still smirking. "I pretty much stick to my sword. Or, lately, a knife. Why change something that works? And when, exactly, was the last time you shot a bow?" Probably the very same day, knowing her. Ah, well. Practising new things should help him occupy himself.

At her last comment, he snorted. "You're telling me. It doesn't matter how perfect your moves are if you don't time -- or aim -- them right. Or your attacks, as the case may be." It may not have been the kindest thing to say, but he had a reputation to keep. Besides, he was referring to himself just as well as to her.

[classic-palm.livejournal.com]

Shadow arrived prepared to drag the woman bodily off the prone figure, but Adam seemed to have things well in hand, so instead he stopped beside the young man.

"Can I do anything to help?" he asked.

He would gladly carry the girl to a more comfortable place, although perhaps it wasn't wise to move her just yet, or help cart the other woman off to... well, wherever Adam wanted to put her. After all, this wasn't just an ordinary hotel which would call the cops on assault and battery like this.

[dangeroushabits.livejournal.com]

"What the fuck was that all about?" John demanded, coming up on Shadow's heels. "She all right? You want me to find Gabriel, Adam?" Of all the times to have left the damn trench behind. He could at least have covered the poor kid up. She'd be in shock for sure. What the blazes had got into War?

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam gave the man a faint brittle smile. Yes, the fight was over with, but now one of his best friends was hurt and needed care.

"Thanks," he said, relieved. "Let's let someone take a look at her first and then if it's okay to move her, maybe you'd carry her to hospital for me?" Adam could do it, but Shadow was bigger and stronger. Wondering where Anathema and Gabriel were, he turned his attention back to his unconscious friend.

[classic-palm.livejournal.com]

"Sure," Shadow said, nodding.

Adam seemed concerned about the girl, as did the man Shadow had just met, but there were others milling about as though nothing had happened, including two men who were talking to the other redhead about... weapons, or something, as though no one was the least bit concerned, or angry about what she had done. Shadow found that odd and rather upsetting.

He crouched down beside Adam and the girl's still form.

"Do you want me to do something about her?" he asked quietly, jerking his head subtly in the direction of the unconscious girl's attacker. "Get her out of here?"

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam glanced at War talking to Mictain and the Doctor with hooded eyes. "No, thanks. I talked to her. It's not gonna happen again or else she'll be leavin' for good." As he said it, he radiated an aura of utter confidence and subtle menace that would have been impossible to argue with. "Besides, no offense or anythin', but as strong as you are, she's prob'ly stronger. People aren't everythin' they seem 'round here."

[classic-palm.livejournal.com]

Shadow nodded slowly.

He'd always known that someday he'd stumble back into this. He'd walked side by side with Gods, worked with them, eaten with them, fought with them, and he couldn't close his eyes to them again even if he had wanted to.

Now he needed to remember which world he was living in; that woman could be anyone, a goddess of war, perhaps, some patron of soldiers. The boy sitting next to him could be anyone, and most certainly he was someone. You could feel it.

Shadow wondered who the injured girl was, and what she had done to the goddess of war to warrant this. As he peered down at her unconscious face he realized suddenly it looked familiar. Where had he seen her before?

"What's her name?" he asked.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

"Pepper," said Adam shortly. "Sometimes she goes by Pippin. Do you know her?"

[ineffable-angel.livejournal.com]

Aziraphale arrived quickly, Anathema in tow, and stood back to allow everyone enough room.

She'd gone so pale, eyes rolled up in a dead faint. "Oh dear," the angel murmured, twisting his hands together nervously.

[anathema-witch.livejournal.com]

"What happened?" Anathema asked, kneeling beside the girl. After a quick look over she saw that Pepper's collarbone was broken and that a nasty bruise was beginning to form on her jaw.

"Alright, nobody move her for now. Can someone grab me something to make a sling out of." She knew that the arm should be moved as little as possible and with the added probability of a concussion, things didn't look good.

"Pepper, can you hear me? Pepper if you can hear me open your eyes." She hoped the girl wasn't truly unconscious and followed her words.

[playswithboys.livejournal.com]

Pepper was pulled out of that dark area by a voice that sounded oddly familiar, but very distant. She dragged her eyes as far openas they would let her and immediately felt nauseous from her trouble. The pain was really making it difficult to focus on anything else.

She found a face above her, and slowly put the features together in her mind so that they recalled a name to her. "Anathema?" she said softly, trying to move a little and finding that it made the nausea worse. "Why am I on the ground? Why am I all wet?" Recent memory a little shredded at the moment, Pepper had no idea that she'd sprayed herself with a hose to dull the spice of food, and was having trouble figuring out what she had done to be in her current state.

[classic-palm.livejournal.com]

Shadow looked around.

Each of the long tables was covered in a sturdy red tablecloth. He got up and went over to the nearest, taking one hemmed edge in both hands.

He pulled.

The fabric snagged, stretched, and started to let go. Then, with a satisfying if slightly painful sound, it ripped cleanly in a long strip.

He brought it back to the woman in time to see that Pepper (Pippin?) had opened her eyes and was talking, albeit muzzily.

[anathema-witch.livejournal.com]

Anathema saw a tall man holding part of a tablecloth and grabbed it.

"Alright, Pepper, this is going to hurt. Try not to move and keep awake alright."

She looked around. "Will someone keep talking to her while I put on the sling, please."

With that said she went about folding the tablecoth in her hands into a triangle. She would wait for someone to begin speaking to Pepper before beginning.