"Then become a damn economist if you have to. You have to move with the times or you won't stand a chance. Why does no one understand that?
And your little pipe-dream about killing Pestilence isn't going to work. If you don't listen to a single other thing that I say, listen to this. There are no simple solutions to complex problems. Sometimes there is no good answer and you have to choose between the lesser of two evils. But you keep making choices and eventually it works out."
Crowley was getting tired. This argument, which he wasn't even sure he should be participating in, coming so soon after the traumatic surgery made him feel flustered and Raphael's question more so. He rolled off the angel and sat on the edge of his bed not looking at Raphael behind him.
"Does it hurt to Fall?" he repeated incredulously. Crowley had never discussed this with Aziraphale, or anyone else for that matter. He barely acknowledged it to himself. And Raphael just asked, as if it were a simple question.
Wondering for a moment what would happen if he didn't answer, Crowley got a very clear image of Raphael looking at him accusingly with fiery eyes and saying, 'You never said!' Shutting his eyes against the picture, he finally answered.
"Yes. More than you can possibly imagine... It's as though everything that you ever liked about yourself was burned out of your soul leaving nothing but a void that you'd do anything to fill up again." There was a pained pause.
"I don't recommend it," he said, resorting to sarcasm to hide the raw emotional honesty. "Hell has a lousy pension plan."
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And your little pipe-dream about killing Pestilence isn't going to work. If you don't listen to a single other thing that I say, listen to this. There are no simple solutions to complex problems. Sometimes there is no good answer and you have to choose between the lesser of two evils. But you keep making choices and eventually it works out."
Crowley was getting tired. This argument, which he wasn't even sure he should be participating in, coming so soon after the traumatic surgery made him feel flustered and Raphael's question more so. He rolled off the angel and sat on the edge of his bed not looking at Raphael behind him.
"Does it hurt to Fall?" he repeated incredulously. Crowley had never discussed this with Aziraphale, or anyone else for that matter. He barely acknowledged it to himself. And Raphael just asked, as if it were a simple question.
Wondering for a moment what would happen if he didn't answer, Crowley got a very clear image of Raphael looking at him accusingly with fiery eyes and saying, 'You never said!' Shutting his eyes against the picture, he finally answered.
"Yes. More than you can possibly imagine... It's as though everything that you ever liked about yourself was burned out of your soul leaving nothing but a void that you'd do anything to fill up again." There was a pained pause.
"I don't recommend it," he said, resorting to sarcasm to hide the raw emotional honesty. "Hell has a lousy pension plan."