"So..." Raphael gasped in sobs. "So maybe... maybe a small effort wouldn't hurt? Just... just to try and see. You know. How it feels.
Not saying I have to do anything," he whispered miserably. "Making an effort doesn't equal sex..." He reiterated, thinking of Michael. "And Aziraphale did it over a century ago...
But what if I loved another Angel more than Him? Then what? I don't want to Fall Gabriel, but on the other hand..."
His eyes grew wide and his body shook.
"What if I Fall anyway for not loving? I've said terrible things Gabriel... terrible things, I was so angry at everything and I didn't stop to think..." Another sob tore out of his throat.
"The others must hate me now. But I don't want them to Fall either. Honest, I don't.
You're the only family I've known... and I love you."
He went limp from emotional exhaustion in Gabriel's arms and let the tears dry on his cheeks.
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Not saying I have to do anything," he whispered miserably. "Making an effort doesn't equal sex..." He reiterated, thinking of Michael. "And Aziraphale did it over a century ago...
But what if I loved another Angel more than Him? Then what? I don't want to Fall Gabriel, but on the other hand..."
His eyes grew wide and his body shook.
"What if I Fall anyway for not loving? I've said terrible things Gabriel... terrible things, I was so angry at everything and I didn't stop to think..." Another sob tore out of his throat.
"The others must hate me now. But I don't want them to Fall either. Honest, I don't.
You're the only family I've known... and I love you."
He went limp from emotional exhaustion in Gabriel's arms and let the tears dry on his cheeks.